Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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