How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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