Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
