A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
