therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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