so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
PANTIES FOUND
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize