remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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