I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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