My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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