Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
