take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize