What did we do last night that was yellow?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
