This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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