It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
