I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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