listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
