I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
