that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
