need another drink. this is the easiest way
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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