I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
My vagina is very pro this idea
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