Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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