I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Randomize