i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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