Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
