Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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