The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
