I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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