He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
