I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize