Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
