if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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