How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
