this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
