there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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