I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
