Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
