talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
