holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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