i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
