Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You can't special order awesome
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
