Tell her she can't have a vagina
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
