it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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