he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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