I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
