we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
