So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
