just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
