is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
