i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
