oh god the rape fog is back!
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
