I just saw a hot homeless man
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
