that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
