loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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